The Fundamentals on Planning Your Own Funeral in Advance

Thinking about your own funeral can be unsettling. But the reality is that planning your funeral ahead of time is one of the most thoughtful things your desperate loved ones can do. It can help you make responsible decisions during a painful time. It can also ensure that your wishes are respected, whether it's a traditional funeral, a memorial cremation, or a more unique ceremony.

Not only that, planning funeral expenses ahead of time also gives you clarity. Funerals are expensive, and costs can accumulate quickly. Planning ahead of time can keep those financial expenses under control and prevent your family from facing financial stress at the last minute. Plus, prepaying for services at current prices can also provide for future cost increases.

Most importantly, planning ahead means your story can be told the way you want it. Do you want a celebration of life, but not a tightly knit party? Do you want a playlist of your favorite songs? Or a personal final resting place that carries deep meaning? These details are important, and planning ahead of time can ensure they don't fall through the cracks.

By breaking it down into simple steps, you can create a plan that gives you and your loved ones peace of mind.

This is the foundation of your plan and will influence many subsequent decisions. Do you prefer a traditional burial, cremation, or green burial?

A traditional burial requires choosing a casket, a burial plot, and often a headstone or tombstone. Many families choose this option because it provides a place to look upon and remember the spirit of their loved one.

Cremation is a flexible option that allows the ashes to be stored in an urn, scattered, or made into clothing such as merchandise. Urnforbeloved offers a variety of urns and memorial jewelry, all made with quality materials, to memorialize your loved one in a more meaningful way. Cremation is generally more cost-effective than a burial and is more convenient for scheduling memorial services.

Green burial focuses on environmentally friendly practices, avoiding the use of embalming chemicals, and using a biodegradable casket or shroud. If you value sustainability, a green burial is a smart choice for you.

Take the time to research each option, considering personal beliefs, cultural traditions, and financial factors before making a decision.

Funerals are deeply personal affairs and don’t necessarily follow a cookie-cutter format. Consider the type of service that best reflects your values and personality:

Do you prefer a traditional religious ceremony in a place of worship?

Would you rather celebrate a life filled with music, stories, and happy memories?

Will the event be small and intimate, or would you prefer a public gathering for all your friends and family?

Will there be any cultural or honorific elements in the neighborhood service?

Think through the details: where it will be held, who will give the salutation, and whether you want specific music, readings, or symbolic elements like a candlelight ceremony. These choices will ensure your ceremony is meaningful and authentic.

Once you know what you need, you can start researching funeral homes. Not all funeral homes offer the same services, and prices can range widely. You can contact all funeral homes and compare:

Service packages and pricing transparency
Accommodation for cultural or religious preferences
Options for funeral prepayment plans and financial planning
Online reviews and testimonials from others who have used their services

If you decide to prepay for funeral services, read the contract carefully. Ask if the price is fixed or if there may be additional costs later.

Create a document outlining your decision and keep it somewhere safe and easily accessible. For example:

Written funeral instructions
Parts of a will (although wills aren’t always read right away)
Online funeral pre-planning services

Make sure at least one trusted person (whether it’s your wife, a child or a close friend) knows where to find these documents if needed.

Funerals can be expensive, but prepaying can lock in current prices and reduce the financial burden on your family. However, this isn’t the best payment option for everyone. If you choose to prepay, choose a reputable service and ask about compensation:

What happens if you move or change your mind?

Are the funds held in a trust or insurance policy?

Are there cancellation fees?

If prepaying doesn’t seem like a good idea, setting up a payable on death (POD) bank account or a life insurance policy designated for funeral expenses is another way to ensure funds are available.

6. What have I discussed with my family?

This is the hardest step, but it’s also crucial. The conversation can be emotional, but it can be disruptive to your loved one’s cognition and emotions. Set aside time to communicate with your family and tell them:

About your choice of burial or cremation urn
The type of service you want
Where they can find your funeral planning documents
Any prepayment arrangements you’ve made

This ensures your wishes are met and allows your family to make a difficult decision during a time of grief. If you’re wondering about choosing the right urn, here’s a complete guide.

Gone are the days when funerals were one-size-fits-all. Today, you have more options than ever to create a farewell that reflects your life and values. Here are some of the most common choices, all with their own advantages:

Traditional funerals

Traditional burials include a casket, burial in a cemetery, and often a formal ceremony. If this is your preference, consider:

Costs of grave materials, burial plots, and headstones
Whether you want a mausoleum, vault, or burial
Cemetery sculpture regulations (some require specific types of markers or vaults)

Cemeteries provide a permanent place for family and friends to visit, and for many people, this is a meaningful choice.

Not all funerals need to follow a traditional format. A celebration of life focuses on joy, memories, and storytelling rather than a stuffy ceremony. These events can include:

A casual gathering with photos and music

A memorial in a meaningful place, such as a park, beach, or family home

Personal elements, such as favorite foods, video montages, or handwritten letters from loved ones

This type of service can provide a very personal and uplifting gathering.